“I bought myself a bra and matching panties.” My client stated  as she smiled at the beginning of our session. In her mid-fifties, she and her husband had been living on separate levels of their home for several years. Realizing she could no longer live the way she was living and needed change had brought her to counseling. Years of feeling unappreciated had lead to lack of self care and low self esteem. Randomly, she recognized that her collection of intimate apparel represented how she was feeling about herself. Bras stretched from wear, panties in unexciting colors and fabric.  She couldn’t remember the last time she visited a lingerie store. Her thought process was there was no need to spend money or care about something that only she was going to see. Our inner thoughts and undergarments speak volumes regarding our self esteem and self confidence.  My client shared she found herself standing taller in her new purchase. She felt a sense of power and confidence. My client had fallen into the habit that the majority of women find themselves. Afterall, lingerie is geared toward attracting someone. Our younger  dating selves may pay attention to style and color. However, as time passes we begin to focus upon comfort and perhaps no longer visit the stores full of a variety of  beautiful colors and styles. Bras become worn and stretched and very little matches. During the course of our sessions, my client and I had been focusing upon her desire to learn to love herself again. Working from home, it was easy for her to spend days in yoga pants and a t-shirt. Although she dressed up for dinner with friends, it was the small details she spent little time thinking about. The importance of purchasing intimate apparel for yourself? Today I want to ask you what is in your underwear drawer? 

  • Does it tell a story of the stage of life you are in?
  • Is it full of matching bras and panties?
  • Are there only a few “nice” pieces and the rest are basic? Do you even wear the nice pieces?
  • Have you resorted to a drawerful of spanx and other slimming, figure enhancing items? .
Can you remember a time when you stood taller because you were wearing an item that was pretty, fit you well and made you feel powerful? Intimate apparel can be found for all sizes and can be worn by all ages. Quit waiting until you lose weight, can fit into a specfic size or have someone to wear it for. Lingerie is an extension of our wardrobe. One can find a variety of beautiful items in a variety of price ranges. Wearing an item torn, faded and stretched impacts the complete presentation. Become aware of the self talk which can be displayed in the intimate items you are wearing. This week I challenge you to throw out those items that have outlived their use. Wear the beautiful bra. Choose a color you would not typically wear. Feel the difference in your stance.

Do you dare tell me what is in your underwear drawer? 



  1. Bourbon & Lipstick on June 14, 2017 at 8:21 am

    This hit me hard today! My drawer has definitely become a slew of functional pieces meant to wear to work only. Nothing exciting.

  2. Ashley Stephenson on June 14, 2017 at 9:50 am

    My drawer has certainly changed over the years! I used to have the fun sexy underwear now cheekies are my go to!

    • Sheryl @ How to Make a Life on June 19, 2017 at 9:41 pm

      It is funny how our lives change. I remember when I finally got rid of the thongs and I used to wear and hadn’t worn in years!

  3. Katie Arnold on June 14, 2017 at 10:29 am

    I love this discussion because it’s so true. When I wear old, raggedy underwear, do I feel confident? No. If I wear a bra that I think causes a little pop out here or there, do I feel good? Definitely not. For me, I actually prefer super COMFY bras and find that sports bras are often my most comfortable pieces. They may not be the “sexiest” thing to wear, but I definitely prefer them. I actually took advantage of the semi-annual sale at VS this week and bought a few new sports bras and also got a lacy bandeau which I wore yesterday and absolutely LOVED. I was comfortable, felt confident and sexy. My budget is tight but at the same time, I’m tempted to throw out 90% of my “regular” bras and replace them with some form of bandeau.

    • Sheryl @ How to Make a Life on June 19, 2017 at 9:41 pm

      I am in need of a new bandeau bra and am guilty of keeping one too long because I haven’t found a good replacement I like. I wear my sports bras at home most of the time because they are so comfortable but I also buy some that are fun. (Hello, Target often has some great ones). It’s important that we don’t neglect the things only we see.

  4. Akaleistar on June 14, 2017 at 10:52 am

    I always feel so much better about myself when I wear new underwear/bras. It’s the little things that really make a difference in life 🙂

    • Sheryl @ How to Make a Life on June 19, 2017 at 9:38 pm

      It is so true about the little things. No one else has to know but if you do, it makes you stand a little taller and feel different. Thanks for stopping by.

  5. Lisa Thomson on June 14, 2017 at 11:53 am

    Love this message. Your client is a great example of how many of us can feel after a long term relationship or marriage is struggling. I’m happy to hear she is making that effort, just for her! I have a great collection of bras and undies but let me say, I’ve taken to buying ‘granny’ panties as they’re referred to. They’re the most comfy but are still flattering LOL. My days of wearing thong unders are over (unless I have to avoid lines). Great post.

    • Sheryl @ How to Make a Life on June 19, 2017 at 9:38 pm

      I agree with you about thongs! I think what is important is that we have a variety to choose from in our collection and that every now and then we wear something different that isn’t just for comfort! (But I will never turn down comfort and cute).

  6. Rachel G on June 14, 2017 at 5:37 pm

    Comfort is key for me–but I will always at least choose fun colors, no whites in my drawer! 😛

  7. shootingstarsmag on June 14, 2017 at 7:16 pm

    I think it makes sense for some, but honestly, I don’t bother with lingerie. I don’t own any and I only have one bra that could possibly be considered “Fun.” hah

    Nice post!

    • Sheryl @ How to Make a Life on June 19, 2017 at 9:36 pm

      I don’t think it needs to be considered “lingerie” but something that makes you feel good. My hope is to get everyone away from items that truly don’t even need to be in the drawer because they are worn out and tired.

  8. Lindsay @ The Flynnigans on June 15, 2017 at 8:09 pm

    My drawer is full of pretties that make me feel nothing but my best. 🙂

  9. Candy Calderon on June 19, 2017 at 10:51 am

    Wow, I have never thought about it that way! Thanks so much for sharing this with us!

  10. Crystal @ Dreams, etc. on June 27, 2017 at 12:12 pm

    I’ve read articles about this subject before and it makes so much sense. I only think about my undergarments when I’m actually buying them, but I have to say that if I’m wearing a new bra that I think is cute, it definitely makes a difference in how I feel.

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