How Creating a Threshold Ritual Can Change Your Day
Do you find it difficult to leave work at work or find yourself worrying about other things when you want to focusing upon something else? You may want to consider creating a threshold ritual to create separation in the areas of your life.
As our lives are heavily scheduled, it is not uncommon to continuously run from one event to the next. One may be at a soccer game but thinking about the deadlines for tomorrow. The areas of our lives easily become blended and with the continuous need to stay connected, there seems to be no time off. Additionally, as more individuals are working at home, there has become less distinction between a work life and home life. Today I want to share a try this at home tip that I use on a daily basis and has helped many of my former clients who work in a variety of work settings. A threshold ritual is a regular event that one creates to indicate the work day or other activity is over. I want to point out that I will be using work as an example but threshold events can be developed for any activity to assist with preparing for something else. Before we go any further, I want to point out that threshold rituals are not complicated and are often very simple but significant in helping to establish separation from work and personal life. I first began helping clients develop threshold rituals when I began counseling a nurse who worked in a physician’s office.. She was struggling with always thinking about her patients she had seen from the day and found herself not wanting to do anything after work. After discussion, she acknowledged that she would often do her errands after work and when she made it home she would fix dinner all while wearing her scrubs. As we talked, I pointed out that by continuing to wear her scrubs she was subconsciously reminding her brain about work. There was no point in her day that she allowed for separation from being a nurse to being a Mom or wife. After a week of changing out of her scrubs after work, she immediately began to feel a difference. Although many of us do not wear uniforms such as scrubs, we can still develop rituals that begin and end our days. Here are a few examples.- As you dress in the morning, you are reminding yourself you are going to work. Taking the time to change into something more comfortable signifies you are in another area of your life.
- Walking through a door can also be a trigger that you are beginning and ending your work day. I used to work in a buidling that had two sets of double doors. During my short few steps in the foyer between the doors, I reminded myself that either my work day was beginning or ending. I left the stories of my clients at the office and returned to them the next day.
- Organizing a space can be a visual reminder that the day is ending. If one works at a desk, taking a few moments to place everything in order can signify the day is over.
- Turning off a work phone or the lights.
- Scheduling a workout class or other event that allows you to separate from work hours.
- Physically close the door to your work space. A closed door signifies the day is over. If you must share the space as an exercise room or some other purpose, consider putting your computer out of site and/or straightening the areas.
- Consider having a work uniform. Stay at home workers are fortunate enough to be able to wear yoga pants and other comfortable options but this also creates no separation in the day. I’m not advocating dressing up but encourage you to allocate certain pieces as work and the others for your personal life. Additionally, consider wearing your hair differently or wearing a watch or other jewelry.
- Stick to a work schedule. Another great benefit from working at home is the flexibility but flexibility can create a constant need to always be “doing” something. Review your schedule and establish hours that are work hours. Tell everyone your work hours and stick to it.
- As I get into my car each day after work, I use a hand sanitizer that smells good. This ritual is two fold and the aromatherapy helps me take a deep breath but also there is symbolism that I am letting go of the day by cleaning my hands.
- Rather than rush home and make dinner, I often attempt to go upstairs and change clothes. This is another reminder that the day is over.
- Walking a dog
- Saying a quick gratitude for your house and family as you park in the garage
- Listening to a specific radio station on the way home.
Do you already have a threshold ritual? What will you try to do this week?
Try This At Home is a weekly series. This series is inspired by Gretchen Rubin’s Happier Podcast where she makes her own try this at home suggestions to make life happier and easier at home. Weekly, I share my own successes and failures as I work towards creating a happier and healthier life.
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I always listen to Christian music on my way to and from work – it reminds me who I am and helps me transition (and not get to road rage-y as well!)
That’s a wonderful ritual. And we all need to not be so road ragey. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by.
This post is seriously perfect. A threshold ritual is exactly what I need to do, since I often get stuck in work mode! :]
// ▲ itsCarmen.com ▲
So glad you stopped by Carmen. Would love to hear what you decide to create for yourself.
This has always been so hard for me which has become harder now that I work from home. But at the same time, since I do work from home, it has become a problem I have to address.
I know it’s difficult for those who work at home (and have smaller spaces) but I think you can come up with something. Would love to hear if you come up with something. XO
I love this! I do often come home and change out of my work clothes but the hand sanitizer idea is perfect. I think I may adopt that one as I have been bringing stress home with me form work for awhile now. Love the idea of washing my hands of it. Thank you!!
The hand sanitizer really just started after I started work at the hospital. It is the first thing I do when I get in the care in the parking garage and it sets the mood for getting home.
Very interesting. I’m going to try to come up with some of my own “threshold” ideas! Thanks Sheryl!
Yea, Jess. I would love to hear what you come up with.
I usually change clothes first and give myself 15-20 minutes to mentally unwind, check in with my stepson and relax before tending to household duties. Great tips!
I’m so glad you have that ritual. We have to give ourselves a break before jumping on the next task.
I change almost as soon as I walk in the door at night… but I do wish I could leave my work stress on the other side. It’s one of my faults! Jason works from home mostly, but he gets dressed up every day. The last time i worked from home I stayed in pajamas and it was VERY hard. That’s a great tip!
I love that Jason gets dressed up every day. I’m not sure I could stay in my pajamas all day – actually, I’m not sure I would get anything accomplished. Hopefully you can come up with something to help you leave things at work.
I love your ritual suggestions. I plan to barrow. Thank you!
Would love to hear what you try Tracy. Thanks for stopping by.
These are really great tips to destress and detach from the day.
They are truly small and simple but can be so beneficial. Thanks for stopping by.
This is absolutely brilliant. Thanks for sharing on Meetup Monday!
Thanks Christine!!
This is really neat – love all the examples you gave, too 🙂
I was always put my pyjamas on when I get home.
I never really stop working — I just change activities. This seems to work best for me. When I feel the need to stop working, I leave the office and go to a chore in the kitchen, watch TV, run an errand, read a book, or do some other non-computer activity.